It really isn’t bad enough that Josh isn’t going to be here until tomorrow morning. Or that the hotel he had to stay in last night cost $109, because all the cheap ones were booked, thanks to several flights out of Chicago being canceled. Or that I shaved my legs this morning for NOTHING.

No, no. My roommate Kate is helping make this weekend more and more like I would imagine sex with an elderly priest would be: unexpected, torturous, and disappointing. Instead of traveling the rest of Europe during part of this week while Josh is here, she’s going to be here pretty much the whole time. She’s going to be here tomorrow. She’s going to be here Monday and Tuesday, because she has to work with children for some stupid community arts project (do children really matter right now? No, my boning schedule does). If I’m lucky, she’ll leave Wednesday so that Josh and I have that evening alone. I have never met such a cock block. I know it’s not all her fault, since those damn children need her. All I have to say is, she’s lucky I’m not the one in the top bunk, because her presence may not be enough to stop the forces that lie within my vagina.

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